i'm feeling quite today!
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Monday, May 20, 2002

i saw this on someone's journal so i decided to do it myself. some of the information is slightly personal in nature, but i don't mind sharing. ^_^


100 things you may or may not know about me...

1. i guess i'm lucky to have been born; apparently, my parents weren't planning on having another child after my sister and brother were born.

2. i bit the tip of my brother's nose off when i was very young, after he threatened to poke my eye out.

3. my middle name is joy, which i don't really like. i have always thought it was too 'girly'.

4. i was extremely shy when i was younger, and only had one or two close friends.

5. i used to have trouble telling people "no" out of fear they would hate me if i was not always nice to them.

6. i often felt like i was not on the same 'level' as the rest of my friends.

7. i attended a very liberal private school when i was younger, which i think contributed to my weirdness. ^^;

8. at said school there were no grades given and students called the teachers by their first name.

9. i was always ahead of my peers in all other subjects except for math.

10. i still hate math. i can't even add up groceries without a calculator. ><

11. i dislike math, but i love science. i always wanted to be a veterinarian or a marine biologist when i was younger, but i knew i could not handle the math courses needed for education in those fields.

12. i've always loved art and drawing, which i feel got me interested in web design.

13. i'm too much of a perfectionalist, and am often my own harshest critic.

14. when i was younger, i was called an 'elf' since i had extremely long hair and small pointy ears.

15. i occasionally wear skirts and dresses, but i prefer pants and shorts for comfort.

16. when i was younger i developed a weight problem that continually bothred me, but i lacked the motivation to get in shape.

17. i've finally started to exercise regularly and have begun losing the weight i've been trying to get rid of.

18. even though i know i shouldn't, i often put unattainable standards on myself and wish i could resemble the waif-thin, airbrushed models in magazines. -_-;

19. i've often felt inadequate because my sister has never had weight problems, and is quite thin.

20. my sister is almost my opposite; she's outgoing, has many friends, and has a degree in biology.

21. i have never had a boyfriend or serious relationship.

22. sometimes i like being around extroverts because they make me feel less shy.

23. i've played the violin for 9 years, and baroque music is my favorite genre to play.

24. although i love playing classical music, i can't stand listening to it.

25. people also say that i sing very well, but i'm too shy to sing in front of people i don't know.

26. my brother and i were once called twins. i guess this is because we used to look alike, and because we always get along so well and almost never argue.

27. my mother sent my brother and i to private school because she believed the elementary schools in our town were crappy. she was right.

28. when i was 12 i took the john hopkin's test to determine if i belonged in a gifted program. my low math scores kept me out.

29. i have been involved in web design for around 3 years, and it is a hobby that consumes most of my free time.

30. i used to take horseback riding lessons when i was younger.

31. things were going well until it was suggested that i ride double bare-back on a draft horse.

32. being the ever-graceful person that i am, i fell on my butt.

33. the other girl, however, managed to stay on.

34. i didn't take many more lessons after that.

35. i have a fear of bees, yet i've never been stung.

36. although it may not seem like it, i'm very emotional.

37. i often act like nothing bothers me, but actually i am very sensitive and i will cry over things that other people might consider insignificant.

38. it took me years to learn to open up to people, but i still have a hard time trusting people.

39. i dream of getting married, someday.

40. i would like to have my wedding ceremony on the beach or in a vineyard, so i can be close to nature.

41. i could never live where it's hot and humid all year long.

42. i find the northern united states to be more appealing than the south and west, in both climate and aesthetics.

43. i don't plan on ever having my own children, but i would consider adopting.

44. if i did adopt a child, i would want just one daughter.

45. i am strongly pro-choice, even though i don't agree that abortion is always the best choice. i think the decision should be left up to the individual woman, not the government.

46. i was raised in a semi-strict christian household, but i don't think i ever completely believed in what i was taught.

47. during high school i began doubting a lot of what i was told, so i prayed to god to help turn me back in the right direction.

48. when i recieved no answer from 'god', i decided i should follow my brain instead.

49. i soon became a hardcore atheist, and took delight in challenging my peers' beliefs.

50. later i realized what an asshole i probably was, so i decided not to bother unless someone challenged me first.

51. i rarely ever enter debates, but when i do, i can always defend myself without much effort.

52. ironically, i dislike public speaking of any kind because i have extreme stage fright.

53. i was also elected as historian of my school's drama club, but i declined when i realized that i had too much stage fright to act.

54. i'm no longer in the drama club, needless to say.

55. i dislike people who put up a facade when they are online, so i try to keep my 'online persona' as true to life as my real persona.

56. i think the only difference is my online persona is much more outgoing and friendly than my real persona.

57. i am normally very reserved and quiet, especially in social situations, where i can become even more introverted.

58. i always chose to work alone when the class was assigned group activities, because i was too scared to introduce myself to others.

59. as a result, people assumed i was a snob and did not wish to associate with them.

60. i was also accused of being a snob because i lived in the so-called "rich neighborhood".

61. i did not spend much time socializing in grade school. i would hear my acquaintances talk about sex, and i would become very uncomfortable because i often did not know what they were talking about and felt embarrassed that they knew things i did not. ^^;

62. i'm usually more comfortable giving advice than taking it.

63. i have not yet had actual sexual intercourse. ^^;

64. sometimes, i feel like i will be doomed to being a virgin forever as a result of being single. -_-

65. even if i was 80 and still a virgin, i would not have sex with someone unless i truly loved him.

66. while most of my views are very liberal, my morals are more on the conservative side.

67. i still hold no definite religious beliefs, but i believe that 'religion' and 'spirituality' are two entirely different things.

68. because i do not think science holds the answers for everything, most hardcore atheists think i am doing a disservice to them.

69. i find that atheists do not like to be told that they are often as dogmatic as the religious people they claim to dislike. ^^;

70. i would like to become a vegan, but i can not give up my love of chicken or dairy products. ^^;

71. i do not approve of animal testing for any reason other than medical science. i prefer to buy products that are not tested on animals if at all possible.

72. i often feel like i would fit in better during a different time in history. possibly the 60's, but the drugs wouldn't interest me. ^^;

73. my mother got contacts for me because she was convinved i would not wear my glasses anymore. in reality, they constantly gave me a headache, so i didn't wear them often. ><

74. i like to experiment with cosmetics, but i can never achieve the dramatic looks shown in magazines. i always end up looking like a clown whore. ^^;

75. i had to start wearing a bra in 5th grade, and even by then i was a 34B.

76. i do not believe in cosmetic surgery of any kind, and i think the lengths people go to achieve "perfection" are very foolish.

77. i do not have a very high view of myself, and i am always pointing out flaws.

78. i love to swim, but i feel very self-conscious in a bathing suit.

79. my personal element is air, although my sun sign element is fire. i can't say i feel NO connection to fire, but air just has more appeal to me.

80. rainy days are more preferable to me than sunny days.

81. i also feel a strong connection to water.

82. sometimes i wish i could escape into a fantasy world where everything has a happy ending.

83. i daydream a lot and often lose track of time while doing so.

84. i still believe in love, but i do not think it is as perfect and wonderful as people (movies and television) make it out to be.

85. i think love is about finding someone who will accept you for who you are, and not try to change you to become their "perfect mate". love is not about perfection, but about accepting the good AND bad about someone, because without bad times, there would be no reason to appreciate the good times.

86. i often feel like i will never find someone to love, and love me back.

87. other times, i'm optimistic that i will find someone in my future.

88. i often feel helpless and i would like to learn some method of self-defense.

89. unfortunately, often i feel helpless simply because i am a woman. because while we can hold jobs, run companies, and manage families, we still cannot fully prevent rape.

90. i sometimes think that women bring a lot of pain onto ourselves. we say we don't want to be treated like sex objects and then we prance around half-naked. women in general annoy me, but i don't think i would like being a man.

91. i love my mother, but she and i are not all that close. she wanted a "normal" daughter, and she got me instead. ^^;

92. my father and i get along very well, and we understand each other. he's got many of the same kinds of quirks and eccentricts i do, and our views are similar on many topics.

93. i enjoy the art and stories of anime/manga, since they show that imagination can take on a whole new meaning.

94. i'd like to visit conventions, and pursue cosplaying.

95. even if i lose my interest in anime/manga, i am still fascinated by traditional japanese culture as well as japanese pop-culture, and i still hope to visit japan one day.

96. while i adore most aspects of japanese pop-culture, american pop-culture annoys the hell out of me.

97. i love goth fashion and i considered going 'goth', until i realized that shopping at hot topic didn't make me any less "trendy" than the people across the mall at abercrombie & fitch.

98. when i was younger i did not like myself, so i often emulated certain classmates i looked up to as well as fictional characters i admired because i thought i would like myself if i could become someone else.

99. i felt better after i could finally accept and love myself for who i am than i ever felt when i was trying to be someone i wasn't.

100. i wonder if anyone has taken the time to read this entire survey. ^^;

           the scent of roses appeared @ 1:33 AM

Sunday, May 05, 2002

look! it's a replica of cloud's buster sword. what a perfect cosplay accessory. although...i just want it because i like cloud. ^~

*makes kitty eyes* won't someone buy it for me?

           the scent of roses appeared @ 1:52 AM

Friday, May 03, 2002





which royalty are you? find out! by nishi.


"as a princess you recognize there is so much about the world you need to learn. you may sometimes be naive but other times you are wise beyond your years! you are sharp, observant, joyous, and interested in your own personal growth. you have a very caring heart, and are a sweet and beautiful woman."

           the scent of roses appeared @ 3:43 PM


what never ending story character are you?
yeah, ceni did this.


ara, another one of my favorite childhood movies. ^^ i always found the child-like empress enchanting. hmm...does she remind anyone else of emeraude-hime? (middle) i suppose it's because they're both ages old, are child-like in appearance, and are of royalty. maybe CLAMP based emeraude-hime off the child-like empress? who knows. ^~

           the scent of roses appeared @ 3:27 PM

Thursday, May 02, 2002

behold! the singing kittay which brings me much enjoyment. :D

still bored? go here too. :B nyo ho ho...

           the scent of roses appeared @ 3:41 PM